Tiny Town, USA – And what a week it was!
Can you remember Monday? Only one of us can, because he is experiencing ulnar nerve entrapment and signed up for surgery on Monday.
The ulnar nerve is not something one ever thinks about until it starts shutting down the feeling work of the wondrous pinky. And whom among you, not under the influence of hallucinogens or picking a booger right now, is considering the pinky?
You will when that baby gets shut down!
Pinky is from the Dutch word for small. The Dutch are good with cute words. Bamboo, for instance, is Dutch. So is Aardvark -- earth pig. Which reminds us of a poem:
Pigs are all pink but pigs have no pinkies
A pig in its sty sho nuf is right stinky.
Other cute words of Dutch origin: Brooklyn, bunghole, caboose, cookie, dike (later, dyke), filibuster, galoot AND geek are Dutchish, Harlem AND Hoboken, kill (as in body of water and how this became a term for murder is an interesting chase); mannequin, PICKLE! Quack -- as in any number of local New Age Hocus Pocusers here in Tiny Town -- Tattoo! Waffle, Wiggle and Wildebeast! All Dutch!
Does that make me like them any more than the French? No! The French slang term for penis is Dinky. And it rhymes with Pinky. Which, after all, is too close a call for many men.
And speaking of dinks, dinguses and whackjobs: Greenstar Coop lost its latest manager.
Her crime? She was forthright, organized, ambitious, sensible, positive, of sound mental health, attractive to both men and women, smart, hard working and, well ... jeez, you can see the poor woman was overqualified for that place from the get-go. She ran screaming out the door we are sure because the exit door was not in working order at Greenstar Friday night.
Yep. She got the fuck out of there and who could blame her? That motley crew of obstructionists on the Greenstar board (the alleged coop itself long become the epicenter of eco-elitism in all 13 original colonies) could not deal with her common sense approach to management. It was too much for a group whose actions make Albany politicians look like a Swiss clockworks by comparison.
She arrived here, full of good will and spirit, maybe thinking Tiny Town was a pretty cool place.
Psych!
Ouch. That hurt the typist's pinky. Which is good. There is feeling the ulnar digit. Maybe we postpone that surgery.
Want some other gossip (An Old English word for talking shit behind people's backs)?
Guess what alleged Austrian/Viennese "cafe" on The Commons pitches its baked goods as home made when in fact, they are the products of -- get this!
Price Chopper?
Their soups?
SYSCO.
The owner?
Ah. Gentle readers: There's a Dutch word for people like him. And it's not Hottentot.
The place is named for the German word "rolls." And what a role model for his countrymen is this entrepreneur!
Woops! Did we just mix up our Austrians with our Germans? Mein Gott! kommen Sie nur nicht auf den Gedanken, dass ...
– C. Penbroke Handy
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